Many cases of suicide are not reported, because there are still many who think that suicide is a very taboo thing to talk about in the community and also the family. This thinking makes it difficult for psychologists, psychiatrists, and researchers to gather data and also find solutions to this problem.
In addition to helping ourselves, we need to help those closest to us. Here are some things we can do for them:
1. Be a Good Listener
The mistake that often happens is that we hear to respond, not to understand. People who are depressed often don't need our advice, they just want to be heard.
Sympathize with the current situation, be patient, calm and try to accept all the stories they share. Our friends or family are doing the right thing by sharing their stories with us.
We can respond to their stories with "what can I help you with?", "Yes, I understand," or "I'm always here if you need". Tell them that we really care about their condition, and they are not alone.
2. Do not judge
One reason many people are reluctant to talk about their mental state is the fear of being judged. Whatever they have experienced in the past, no matter how bad it is, even though it does not correspond to the moral values that we profess, don't judge them ever.
Take the time to listen to what they are feeling. It is not a matter of what they have done, but rather about how they feel about it and also what they think of themselves.
3. Don't Bully People Who Are Depressed
It has often been proven that bullies can greatly trigger suicide. The effects of bullying on the feelings and qualities of the victim are very destructive. They will feel worthless, unloved, undesirable.
Put ourselves in their position. Do we want to be embarrassed in public? If not, then don't do it to other people.
4. Don't Comparison with Others
Saying that you know how people feel depressed will not help at all. It's the same as making comparisons with other people. "If she can, why you can't?" This will only make people with depression more desperate.
The reason is, people have their own capacity in controlling emotions and solving problems, so you can't equate one problem with another.
5. Don't Be Harsh
If you think being tough will scare depressed people, this just won't work. For example, you threaten to leave because you are impatient with your depressed friend's condition. This is not useful because it will only make them feel worse and depressed.
6. Be patient
The key to assisting depressed people is patience. By being patient, you indirectly tell that whatever happens, you will always be on the side of a friend or family member who is depressed.
Accompanying people with depression is like walking on eggs, one wrong step will certainly make things worse. As a solution, being patient with that person is the best gift for them.
7. Persuade Them to Get Help from Professionals
If the condition of our friends or family does not improve, we must slowly advise them to get serious help.
Reassure them that there is help and also the thought of suicide is only temporary. Tell them that their lives are very important to us and also family.
If your friend is aware of expert help as a psychologist or psychiatrist, that's a good sign. If something happens, make them feel comfortable so that they will not reluctant to meet with experts, such as to consult directly. Also, make sure you become a person who can be relied on if he tries to hurt yourself or someone else. You need to know emergency numbers, like hospitals.
8. Learn to empathize or fully understand their feelings
When someone struggles with depression, he will not just tell stories and then forget the problem. Try to empathize or fully understand their feelings. Maybe you do not experience firsthand what they experienced, but try to position yourself if you experience it.
Even so, try not to be carried away with emotions, such as crying or howling. Remember, you are there to calm, not just make the atmosphere worse. In addition, with you to follow emotions are the same as the health of your soul disturbed.
9. Take good care of yourself because dealing with depressed people is not easy
Unlike your friends who are easily cheerful and happy, people with depression sometimes make you tired and frustrated. In essence, make sure you are safe and sound physically and mentally before helping your friend. If you feel tired, give yourself time to be alone and improve your mood. You should know that you can't be by their side all the time.
You also need to live your life and make yourself happy.
You definitely want your depressed friend to feel happiness and laughter again. However, you need to know that it won't all happen instantly. Need consistent and slow effort. You need to be sincere in doing this business. Let's just say you are doing charity for humanity.
Every year, there are millions of people in the world who experience problems with mental conditions. They can be friends, family, partners, or even ourselves.
Remember, there are many people who love us. Stay strong and don't give up.
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